


I can't

by weddingbells



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Falling In Love, Love, M/M, larry stylinson - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-28
Updated: 2013-05-28
Packaged: 2017-12-13 06:46:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/821269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weddingbells/pseuds/weddingbells
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><em>You can’t help that you love someone endlessly</em> Harry thinks as Louis brushes his hand against Harry’s in the elevator</p>
            </blockquote>





	I can't

**Author's Note:**

> I should stop to write oneshots late at night.

_You can’t choose to fall in love_ Harry thinks as he watches Louis flip his hair across the table, sassy in a way that shouldn’t be legal and with eyes sparkling like stars on a clear night sky, so rare and so beautiful just like everything Louis Tomlinson is. Laughter sparkling along with the eyes as he makes a joke to Niall about tour buses and footie and Niall laughs and talks back about something even funnier that Harry doesn’t hear, can’t really listen to because the movement of Louis’ lips forming words has him completely enchanted.

 _You can’t help that you love someone endlessly_ Harry thinks as Louis brushes his hand against Harry’s in the elevator, completely innocent and probably not even aware but Harry is aware, oh Harry is so aware, Harry is aware to the point of no return, there’s no going back, Harry feels electricity down his spine as Louis just continues to talk to Liam, talking like nothing mattered, like nothing is going on.

 _You can’t help falling for someone that doesn’t_ _understand_ Harry thinks as he watches Louis drinks a bottle of water on stage, winking at him before putting it down, a joke, a shameless flirt just to get some attention in a way that Harry doesn’t really understand, doesn’t want to understand, just want to jump Louis and scream, begging for attention, begging for him to understand, to finally realize what they are all about, but Harry is quiet as Louis just moves on, and Harry is left while Louis is far ahead.

 _You can’t help that you cry into your pillow at_ _night_ Harry thinks as Louis takes off his shirt just inches from Harry’s face after a workout and Louis is sweaty and beautiful as he laughs about being disgusting and getting into a shower but Harry doesn’t agree because Louis is beautiful no matter how much sweat covers his body, Louis is a star and Harry is just dust in the wind, and Louis takes off his pants almost visible to Harry as he’s getting into the shower and Harry has to painfully look away, hoping that Louis will never, ever notice the throbbing in his jeans and the longing in his heart.

 _You can’t help that you miss someone just inches away from you_ Harry thinks as they are cramped into a tour bus and trying to get along on minimum space as Liam and Niall play a game and Zayn is on the phone and Louis legs are on top of Harry’s as they are both in the sofa and Louis is talking and Harry tries to listen but Harry is really just not good enough to be able to keep his mind off the way Louis’ skintight jeans show off too much of the things that Harry will never ever be able to touch, not now and not ever, not in the way he wants to and he has to swallow and try not to be obvious.

 _You can’t help that you want someone that doesn’t want you back_ Harry thinks as Louis jumps him, hugging him tight after award shows and Louis’ breath is on his neck and it’s warm and beautiful and scary at the same time and Harry tries to remember how to breathe as Louis holds him close, calling him Haz as he says good job, making stupid nicknames for stupid friends and Harry tries to smile back and say the same thing, not showing how he wants Louis’ head resting on his shoulder forever along with his hot warmth of breath lingering on his skin.

 _You can’t help to believe there will sometime be something between you_ Harry thinks as newspapers start talking about gossip between the two of them and how maybe they are not as straight as they want to be and management freaks out and forces Harry to go on countless of dates as Louis is with Eleanor and Louis squeezes his hand for comfort, telling him that it will be okay and that the rumors will go away and that the public will soon realize that they are just good friends and nothing else.

 _You can’t help that you want to be open and honest_ Harry thinks as he tries once again to make out with a girl in front of the paparazzi but it all turns out so obviously fake, and when he is on a date with Taylor Swift and she tells him how he’s impossible and can’t even try to lie, and Harry tries to say that it isn’t such a bad thing and that not being good at lying should be a good thing, when Taylor Swift just shakes her head, making him out to be an impossible case as she tells him that in this industry it’s not a good thing to be an open book.

 _You can’t help that you’re hurting_ Harry thinks as he sits next to Louis in front of an endless line of fans wanting their autographs and when one girl asks Louis is the rumors about him and Harry might actually be true, and Louis turns on his leeriest smile, telling her that no, they are not true sadly, and that he even wishes he could tell her that there’s some truth to it since it obviously looks like it means a lot to her, but no, it’s not true and him and Harry are just friends, nothing more. And Harry watches the girl’s eyes fill with tears and he has to turn away because he feels like he’s going to be sick.

 _You can’t help falling in love with Louis Tomlinson_ Harry thinks because it really isn’t fair, because Louis is perfect and always there and his laughter can set every nerve in Harry’s body on fire, like star drizzles on a night sky and Harry is so lost in freckles and soft skin and the way Louis smiles that he isn’t sure he will ever be able to get out.

 _You can’t help to be stupid sometimes_ Harry thinks when he gets out of controllably drunk one night when he’s tired of it all and of the lies and having to put up with an image of himself that he doesn’t even want and spills the last of his drink in Louis’ lap as he slurs out in front of all the boys that he’s hopelessly and stupidly lost and he’s lost in Louis and he will never get out, and he slurs out how he is in love to a point where he didn’t even understand you can be this much in love and angrily gaze down on the confused eyes of Louis as he mumbles a ‘fuck it’ leaving them at the bar, hoping no one will see him as he makes his way back home, heart aching along with his head and body.

 _You can’t help to be afraid_ Louis says when he’s made his way home and sits on the side of Harry’s bed, stroking his head as Harry wants to throw up for being stupid and rude and very much drunk, grunting and really wanting Louis to go away but Louis isn’t going anywhere, Louis stays and Louis talks about how stupid boys can fall so stupidly in love and how scary it is to lose control, and how control is never something he has when Harry is around, and that the world is complicated being the two of them, and how maybe they will never be able to have what they want.

 _You must make a choice sometimes_ Louis says as he carefully leans down and grabs Harry’s curls, pulling him into a kiss that is like fireworks, like Christmas morning and the late summer nights, like the way salt water tastes on your skin and Harry tries to keep his mind sane but he’s spinning like a merry-go-round and Louis kisses him and it’s just not supposed to happen but it his, and Harry tries to catch his breath as Louis pulls his shirt off, laying down on top of him.

 _Sometimes things will work out_ Harry thinks as the sunlight wake him up and his bed isn’t just occupied by him, but by a sleepy Louis Tomlinson nuzzling into him, holding an arm lazily around his waist as Harry’s insides are exploding, dancing and building up all the things falling apart before this night, and Harry leans down to kiss Louis’ nose and realizes that he is actually there and it isn’t just a dream.

 _Sometimes you just have to fight the world_ Harry thinks as their manager tells them they can’t be together and that they need to stay apart and Louis hisses out a ‘fuck you’ before getting up to leave, pulling Harry with him as they walk outside the street and it is raining and Harry doesn’t like rain but when Louis kisses him despite all the warnings and even though people are watching Harry finds rain being quite the perfect weather.

 _Sometimes you’re just going to have to realize that you are happy_ Harry thinks when he lets go of all dark thoughts ever living in his brain and replacing them with images of Louis laughing and Louis holding him close, Louis telling him how everything will be alright.

_Because they are meant to be._


End file.
